"Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water" -- W.C. Fields

How to be Smarter: The last thing you read before you go to bed is what you will remember when you wake up. Read over your notes in bed or a speech you are giving the next day before you drift off and it will simmer around in your brain all night. 
How to be Prettier: In this awkward stage in between winter and summer, before your legs have had time to tan themselves and you've had time to lost the winter weight, wear skin tone nylons with a bit of sheen under your shorts. Just don't give away that you are wearing nylons by wearing flip flops, you must wear closed toe shoes with them. 
How to be (less) Awkward: A good rule for knowing when to sleep is that when your phone is dead, you are dead too. Sleep. This is effective because when your phone has died it means it has not been charged in a while, because you have either not been home or been too busy. Go recharge both your batteries.